I had brain surgery a week ago, WTF!?!?

I don't have much to report and that's a good thing. I am feeling good (thanks to good protoplasm according to my neurologist). I can't believe a week ago at this time they had my skull opened up! I'm off all pain meds, weening off the steroids (the sooner the better, they make me feel like I have had 10 cups of coffee) and other than a tight feeling and a crazy scar (real halloween shit) I'm doing fine.

I will admit that while physically I'm doing great, I haven't really wrapped my brain around what has happened yet. I don't know when it will sink in or if it ever will (do I want it too?). This whole thing is just completely surreal. It's like I just lost a week. Feeling as normal as I do doesn't help (not that I'm complaining!). The reality is maybe it's just easier for it not to sink in. My diagnosis is a fucking depressing thing and thinking about it too much doesn't do any good or change a thing.

The one thing this has made me very aware of is the importance of being as healthy as possible at all times. While my neurosurgeon's comment about good protoplasm was funny, it is the truth of the matter. I went in to this whole thing doing pretty well. I eat pretty healthy, I am not too skinny or too fat (yes, of course I'd love to lose a few pounds, but I've got bigger fish to fry and yummy food to enjoy!) and I'm pretty active. All that stuff made this latest crapfest a hell of a lot easier to come back from. I say this and I'm not preaching about running or going to the gym, I'm just saying I can't afford to be a couch potato. It is just a matter of time for this kind of shit to happen again and I want to be in decent shape when it happens. So, I'm walking at least 3 miles a day (thanks to Red, my mom and Keith for always keeping me company). Right now, I'm doing it in 1 mile increments, but I don't think it will be too long before I am going for longer stretches. I feel like I could do even more, but am aware that there are some things to be careful off (lifting heavy things, bending over, etc).

So for now, I'm just sort of relaxing and "recovering". I'm thinking I'll be ready to go back to work part time sometime next week. I don't have any doctor appointments (other than stitch removal with a nurse practitioner) until mid October. At that point I'll go back on Herceptin and get another brain scan before the radiation oncologist weighs in on what comes next. It sounds like there will be some kind of radiation in my future to "mop up" anything that got left behind. Brain lesions are tricky because most chemotherapies and targeted therapies (like Herceptin and Tykerb) don't make it through the blood brain barrier. Urgh!