"She's Old Enough For A Relaxer"

Now you all know I didn't say that...but it was said to me. Here's the story:

After wearing her hair in small twists for a couple weeks, Syd was anxious to see her beloved "big hair" again. When taking the style out, I wet her hair and added a lot of Kinky Curly Knot Today. Once all the twists were out, we were left with hair that looked very similar to (but not exactly like) a wash-n-go. It was big and Syd loved it. I told her she could let her curls fly freely all weekend, knowing that she didn't have school on Monday and we'd style it that day.

This is what her hair looked like all weekend: big, but moisturized and healthy.

We had a busy weekend. We spent time shopping, at church, and at the park. Syd got compliments on her hair everywhere we went. She also got looks from people who obviously weren't fans of such huge hair. I think that's why Syd loves wearing her hair like this. Love it or hate it, people DO notice hair that big.

We can usually tell when someone doesn't like the mass of curls on Syd's head. Their facial expressions make that obvious. But the only actual comments we've ever received have been positive. I guess a lot of people in our area follow that golden rule: If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. But this weekend, one woman in particular didn't follow that rule.

We were hanging out having a good time when this woman looked at me and said, "You know, she's old enough for a relaxer."

I looked at this woman and said something to the effect of, "Yes. She's old enough. But I don't plan on destroying her hair just to try to help her fit in with people who don't love her the way she is." She didn't really have a response for that, so the encounter was over.

Not everyone is going to appreciate the beauty Syd and I see in a head full of loose curls. I get that. And I completely accept that. After all, we all have our own opinions and preferences. But since when is it appropriate to suggest to a parent that they alter their child's appearance? Actually, I know the answer to that question: IT'S NOT!

What about you? Have you ever been on the receiving end of this type of comment? How did you handle it?